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Thanksgiving with Takeo Spikes
Written by Shaun Flynn   
Thursday, 26 November 2009 16:02
Panthers Hope Rosetta Stone Will Help Jake Delhomme
Written by Shaun Flynn   
Thursday, 29 October 2009 14:16
DelhommewarmupsCHARLOTTE, NC - It's been a tough season for Carolina Panthers quarterback Jake Delhomme.  As week 8 approaches, The Panthers have only 2 wins and are only ahead of the winless Tampa Bay Buccaneers in the NFC South.   Delhomme has only 4 touchdown passes this season compared to his 13 intererceptions. 

Panthers coach John Fox has stood his ground in keeping Delhomme as the starter. 

"It's not like we have any alternatives at the position.  Sure we have Matt Moore and A.J. Feely, but we obviously just signed those guys to use at practice" he said.  "The biggest problem with the offense is the communication.  Nobody on the team can understand what Jake is saying."

Delhomme is Cajun by birth and speaks Creole.  Throw in a thick southern accent and you have a recipe for miscommunication.  Even some of the Bojangles commercials he appeared in had to be dubbed over.

Determined to help Delhomme, the team chipped in this week and bought him the Rosetta Stone English edition.  Rosetta Stone is a language learning software that uses pictures, text, and sound to teach foreign languages the way first languages are learned.  The Panthers hope the program will help get the quaterback on track. 

On Thursay, it was obvious that Delhomme had not started using the Rosetta Stone software and was more focused on his health when asked about the program .

"Souple, ban mwen. Mwen malad. Mwengebdjare,"  he said.  Which translates to, "Please excuse me.  I am sick.  I have diarrhea."
Last Updated on Wednesday, 21 April 2010 12:58
Sanchez Reveals Weiner Addiction
Written by Shaun Flynn   
Tuesday, 27 October 2009 15:10

250px-Mark_Sanchez_-_Jets_-_Sept_2009OAKLAND - Everyone has a dirty little secret, but Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez's secret played out on national television.  Sanchez shocked the nation Sunday when he was caught by cameras with a weiner in his mouth on the Jets sideline during a football contest against the Oakland Raiders.    

"I would like to apologize to my family, my fans, and the entire Jets organization for my actions on Sunday.  I do plan to seek help for my addiction," Sanchez said.

In the post game news conference, Sanchez admitted to experimenting with weiners while celebrating a Jets victory last month in Manhattan.  He claims that he never had a weiner before he was drafted by New York.

The Sanchez incident brings light to the weiner epidemic in New York City.  City officials estimate the weiner trade has become a 200 million dollar a year business in the big apple.  Almost 100,000 weiners are bought on the streets of New York city every day.

Last Updated on Saturday, 21 November 2009 14:23
Jim Zorn: "I Just Threw Up In My Mouth"
Written by Shaun Flynn   
Tuesday, 20 October 2009 15:58

ZORN2LANDOVER, MD - After the losing to the previously winless Kansas City Cheifs on Sunday, Washington Reskins coach Jim Zorn was stripped of offensive play calling duties.  The change was made by executive vice president of football operations Vinny Cerrato.

During his postgame news conference, Zorn went on a self depricating rant and placed the blame for the poor start on himself.

"I'm disgusted with myself.  I threw up in my mouth on the way into the locker room," he said.

Play calling duties will now be hands of Sherman Lewis, aka The Shermanator, who was hired as a consultant for the struggling offence. 

With The Shermanator now controling the play calling, the offense is poised for improvement.  However, some players say the change is irrelevant.

"Winning would be nice, but I get paid anyway," linebacker London Fletcher said.

Last Updated on Friday, 20 November 2009 01:31
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